Article By Michael Jericho on 12th August, 2009
3. They have two QBs with zero talent.
4. No Bill Belichick disciple has ever had success outside of Belichick's staff.
5. They're the Browns.
6. Half their team will likely come down with a staph infection by Week Four.
7. Drew Carey's generated tons of bad karma by ruining The Price Is Right.
8. Seriously, they're the Browns. I'm writing this as satire, and I can't even come up with 10 witty reasons why they won't. They just won...
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